Alex Foxe: Memories of My First Pornographic Shoot

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Text by Alex Foxe, Copyright 2024


Memories of My First Pornographic Shoot


So I’m on my way to go to my first pornographic shoot. I’m nervous, excited, worried I’m gonna get lost. I’ve got my printed MapQuest directions in one hand, skipping music through my six CD changer, trying to decide what an appropriate song to my first porno might be. 

I get to the top of this mountain with this amazing ranch home and there’s a big huge red barn, and after I park my car and get out, I can see the ocean in the distance. 

I’m still curious who owned the house. It felt like a cross between, kind of a modern bonanza, meets old Hollywood western movie set.

Now we’re talking, I was greeted by someone on the crew. I don’t remember their name of course but Skye Blue was there, and after we exchanged our hugs she escorted me to where I could put my things. I put my outfits, shoes, and other personal items that I kept in a gym bag. 

Word got around fast this was my first movie. I thought that everyone was being extra nice to me because it was my first movie. I found out later on other movies sets, that everyone I worked with was nice. 

I found the kitchen where there was a ton of food and drinks. A really amazing spread. There was a make up artist and people were hanging out in the kitchen area talking about their lives. Their kids and what they were shooting. It felt completely normal and everyone was very nice to me and nice to each other.

I’m not sure if it was a week or two before I was on the movie set that Skye had asked me if perhaps I might be interested in shooting a movie for her.

I was working as a chat camgirl for her and I was making a decent living. I think we received like $15 an hour base pay plus commission. Skye Blue was definitely ahead of her time. There was one camgirl working there that everybody talked about. She wasn’t there regularly, but when she was there, she was doing privates and making bank. If anybody’s ever worked in the industry, there’s always been at least one of those kind of girls. Not anything bad about them, they just had that “It” factor and well, Stacy Burke had “It” and still does. Just like when I was eating Mexican food at Casa Vega on a double date, and who do we see, George Clooney and Renée Zellweger. She was doing that cute laugh that girls do when they’re really into a guy. And of course she was doing that because George had this glow about him as if he had that Barbara Walters lens that all the camera guys used to joke around about. Is that still a thing? Anyways, where was I? Back to the movie. 

I’m not sure where exactly I laid eyes on what would be my future boyfriend. If I were to guess I would say in the kitchen because I love food. 

He was goofy, with all these amazing tattoos. But more importantly, he made me laugh. That is truly the gateway to my heart!

We made our way over to the site where they were shooting a scene. Obviously, the bed was unoccupied. If you know, you know. 

Me and the photographer laid horizontally, clothes on of course, across the bed like two kids in the 1970s sitting on orange shag carpet in my friends dad‘s house watching Deep Throat on VHS.  I was fascinated, excited, I had never seen anything like it. I also felt sorry for Linda because some thing was wrong with her throat.. Anyway, my relationship with the photographer will be important later, and I will come back to that in another story. Now it was my turn for “Action”! 

Late into the evening it was finally my turn to shoot my scene. I’m led out to the set by our very own “Scotty” to where we will be shooting my scene. I had met my costar earlier in the day and she was super nice about everything and more. Sindee Coxx had been in the business for quite a while and has made a lot of adult films. She was super nice, funny, she had an infectious laugh, she was the complete 1990’s adult film starlight. I’m sure working with Sindee made Skye’s job a lot easier. That day we walked out to the set, which was outside. It was now nightfall and it was pretty cold. One thing you should know about me is that I don’t like to be cold. The premise of the story is that I am a slave girl and naturally, would be naked. The lighting was great. Everybody was on set and Sky talked about what she wanted to shoot and I believe she told me to enjoy myself. 

We start off with Sindee inspecting my body. She orders me to stick out my tongue, and then she pulled on my tongue ring which was a surprise to me. Sindee instructed me to remove my bottoms that had buckles to keep them up. Then she presents to me some green fruit that has a slit in it. It looks like a vagina. Wearing this amazing vinyl outfit, and I will note that it is because she has clothes on LOL, 

She holds the fruit in front of her, instructing me to lick it. She’s fully clothed and I’m naked on my knees facing her and plunging my tongue deep into this green fruit. I might note that I have never done this before in my life, but my rules for working in adult is, if I would not do it in my personal life, I certainly was not going to do it on film.

So I’m eating out green fruit. I can’t remember all the details about the movie. I do remember freezing my ass off and that Sindee was amazing and it was a great experience. I thought to be fair, i’d watch the movie to see if it reminds me of anything that I’m forgetting or any points I don’t wanna miss. I don’t think people realize how long it takes to shoot good porn. Now I’m sitting here watching fetish island and she has me fingering the big hard green fruit. I Jam my fingers in there and pull them out and suck on them. I look up. Cindy‘s breast are exposed and she’s got a banana in her hand.

She put it into position of where her dick would be if she had one and instructed me to blow her. Of course, I’m blowing the banana deep throating it, which I do remember starting to gag on the banana, and mind you this is something I’ve never done on camera before. I think I was so comfortable because of the crew and the cameraman, Barry Wood. He was very good at camera work.  Looking back, I probably should have paid more attention to what goes on behind the camera. 

Anyways, at one point, the banana goes down the wrong way and I’m trying not to gag and I know we’re filming and a single tear runs down my cheek. Barry was over the moon that he caught it on film. 

I have to say, re-watching it now, It does look really good and ties everything together. I wish I could say that I shed that tear on purpose. 

I peel the banana with my teeth and then she asks me to remove her clothes so I takeoff her vinyl outfit. She lays back on the lounge chair and has me worship her feet. I’ve never worshiped anyone’s feet before. I guess it was just instinct. I look at her and suck on them. She put a Maraschino cherry on the top of her foot and I eat it off. I told the crew that I knew how to tie a cherry stem in a knot. They all laughed and instructed me to tie the stem, which, of course I really did not know how to do.

Five more Marcinho cherries between her toes  I eat another one. I’m glad they didn’t have me eat all five. 

Sindee starts kissing me and quietly tells me to suck on her tongue. We kiss pretty passionately. My nipples are so hard and I’m freezing, as the saying goes, I could probably cut glass. 

Sindee licks my tits and hard nipples and then asks me to lean back on the chaise lounge. Once again, I lay down horizontally. Sindee has these amazing green eyes.

I’m looking down at her while she is licking my pussy, and while I was being filmed. With the hair and make up people standing by for touch ups was the closest to Hollywood starlet I would ever feel. Watching my first movie again, hearing the super loud synthesizer adult music. I wish the crew would’ve left the portable propane powered heater that we were able to use between takes on. They said it was too loud to film with it on. 

She bends me over and fucks me with a strap on. Sindee shoves a bunch of grapes in my mouth to be quiet. Now looking at it feels like an OSHA violation. That’s a joke for those of you that do not know me yet. 

 I climaxed all over the dildo, I might add we used my own personal strap on in the film which I still have. The scene ends with Sindee caressing my body. 

Before I knew it the shoot was wrapped for the day and it was time to go home. I remember having such a great time, and it was such a positive experience. I was excited to shoot another movie, I’m sure I asked Skye when was the next movie. Watching my first movie yesterday after 20 years has filled my brain with lots of thoughts. I’m sad I left the adult industry when I did, not because I necessarily wanted to, but because my family once they found out my new career choice were determined to make my life difficult, actually they tried everything in their power to destroy me. 

Most of the boyfriends I had during my time in the industry, said they were fine that I was a porn star, but later in the relationship the comments, guilt trips, and arguments before and after shoots were exhausting   What’s funny is I mostly dated people that had something to do with adult or mainstream films. I wish I had the courage I have today to not allow others to influence my life choices without thinking of what I want. And standing tall and proud in my decisions. 

Alex Foxe at Home.

For additional articles by Alex Foxe, link here:

Alex Foxe: Travel Days Memories of 1996

Text by Alex Foxe, Copyright 2024


Travel Days: Memories of 1996


Finding myself naked on the roof of a gentleman’s club in Athens, Greece, was certainly not how I envisioned spending the summer of ’96.

The journey to Athens started while I was working the feature circuit in Canada. I had heard from fellow dancers that one could make substantial money in places like Japan, Macau, or Greece without compromising one’s personal boundaries. Tempted by tales of earnings over $30,000 a month plus tips, and enticed by stories of dancers returning with piles of cash and the latest gadgets, a few girlfriends and I auditioned through our agency in the plush executive suites of Vancouver hotels for a three-month stint abroad.

When an opportunity arose to meet a talent scout for a Japanese club, my friend Misty—who was absolutely stunning with her petite frame, long blonde hair, and natural beauty—and I attended the audition. While she was immediately selected, I faced a request from the scout to undress to my comfort level, which did not include removing my panties. Ultimately, I wasn’t picked for Japan, which was disappointing as Misty was the first real friend I had made in Canada. She had an impressive work ethic and aimed to own a franchise of the Original Pancake House, a place she adored. Misty was the one who introduced me to Dutch Baby pancakes, which remain my favorite to this day.

Instead, I landed a three-month gig at a club in Athens, accompanied by Georgia Peach, a colorful character with a tough exterior whose estranged husband was part of a famous motorcycle gang. Georgia was fiercely independent, the first wife in her husband’s chapter to get her own Harley Davidson—a rare feat at the time. She advised against getting too involved with the bikers, a tip I took seriously given her insights and my own prior knowledge of the organization.

Our trip included a 10-hour layover in London, where Georgia and I explored the city on a double-decker bus, taking in sights like Big Ben and Buckingham Palace, and sampling some classic fish and chips before continuing on to Greece. Upon arrival, we learned we’d be staying in a small guest house behind a large residence less convenient than a hotel, it required expensive taxi rides to the club and adherence to a strict curfew. One morning, returning late, we narrowly escaped an encounter with the estate’s guard dogs, thanks to the separating distance of a large swimming pool.

Rehearsals filled our weekdays. While some dancers easily picked up the routines due to their experience, others like myself found it challenging, especially since I wasn’t skilled in pole dancing, making group choreography mandatory. The club was often quiet—a result, we later learned, of the owners not paying off the local mob, which explained the sparse clientele. Despite efforts, the earnings were far below expectations. The regulars knew of the club’s tip policy and discreetly passed us cash folded into small squares, which I learned to stash in my knee-high boots—a wardrobe choice that soon became a daily necessity.

We had a diverse group of dancers from Canada, America, and Eastern Europe, who all bonded well. My heart went out to those who couldn’t leave or chose to stay because even a little money was better than none. Most of the girls sent money back to their families. During my stay, two sisters introduced me to a charming man named Dragon—indeed, his real name.

Increasingly wary, we were often pressured to hand over our passports for “safekeeping.” I knew better than to relinquish mine. One night, just after a performance and while clad only in my boots, we were tipped off about an impending police raid. In a frenzy, we were led along a hidden path that took us up to the roof where we hid for hours, shivering and fearing arrest for working illegally.

Lying there under the stars, naked and cold, I resolved to find a way out of Athens. Little did I know that escaping to surprise my boyfriend, Dragon, in Yugoslavia would be my way out. It turned out that while club security was searching for me at the airport expecting me to return to Canada, I was at another, heading to a completely different destination. This move effectively marked my escape from the club and its questionable practices, and unknowingly, set me on a path to a new chapter in my life.


Alex Foxx adult actress wearing SEX blouse
Portrait of Alex Foxe by Tony Ward, Copyright 1996

Fantasy: A Clear Night in Paris

Two people photographed at night looking stylish in Paris neighborhood
Photo: Tony Ward, Copyright 2024

Photography and Text by Tony Ward, Copyright 2024


A Clear Night in Paris


It was a clear night in Paris, the kind that draws lovers out into the open air. The quarter moon hung brightly in the sky, bathing the city in a soft glow. Ross  sat alone on a bench in a tiny park not far from the Eiffel Tower. Though the hour was late, he was wide awake, lost in thought.

He  was considered by many to be a handsome man – tall, with dark hair, a neatly trimmed beard and a stylish dresser. A lawyer by profession, dark suits were accented by ties and KVaughn scarves for a more casual look. But, his rugged looks did little to ease the loneliness he felt. For weeks now, he had come to this spot, hoping to catch a glimpse of HER.

The woman who walked by the park every night on her way home from one fashionable event or another. The vision of this woman who often wore black had stolen his heart at first sight. He knew nothing about her, not even her name, yet he was utterly captivated and hoped he would soon see her again.

On one particular  night,  a photographer was photographing in the park on a fashion shoot.  As if on cue, she appeared first in the distance, looking like a Parisian goddess in her dark sunglasses and sheer black dress.  Ross straightened up, with his pulse quickening. As she drew nearer, he noticed she carried a half-empty glass of champagne in one perfectly manicured hand. His brows furrowed slightly, sensing something was off. Her usual confident stride seemed slower, more wavering as the photographer, Tony Ward snapped her passing him by.

An attractive woman passes a male admirer seated on a park bench in Paris at night.
Photo: Tony Ward, Copyright 2024

Pop Culture: What is Femdom?

Dominatrix at Pandora's box in NYC seated on a throne
Photo: Tony Ward, Copyright 2024

Text by ChatGBT


Edited by Tony Ward


What is Femdom?


Femdom, short for female dominance, is a subgenre within the realm of BDSM (bondage, discipline, dominance, submission, sadism, and masochism) that revolves around the concept of female authority and control. This dynamic is characterized by consensual power exchange where a dominant woman, referred to as a dominatrix, exercises control over a submissive partner, typically a man.

The origins of femdom can be traced back to ancient civilizations where female dominance and matriarchal societies were prevalent. Throughout history, there have been cultural depictions and narratives of powerful women exerting control over men, often portrayed in mythology, literature, and art.

In modern times, femdom gained prominence as a distinct subculture within BDSM circles during the mid-20th century. It was influenced by the burgeoning sexual liberation movements and the exploration of alternative sexual practices. Femdom attracted individuals interested in exploring power dynamics and fetish play, with a focus on female empowerment and sexual expression.

Femdom encompasses a wide range of activities and practices, including but not limited to bondage, humiliation, foot worship, chastity, and role-playing. Dominatrices often utilize a variety of tools and implements, such as whips, chains, and restraints, to assert their authority and enforce discipline over their submissive partners.

The dynamics of femdom relationships vary widely, ranging from casual play sessions to long-term, committed partnerships. Communication, trust, and consent are fundamental principles within femdom relationships, with boundaries and limits established and respected by all parties involved.

In popular culture, femdom has been depicted in various forms of media, including literature, film, and television. While representations may sometimes sensationalize or stereotype femdom dynamics, they have also contributed to greater visibility and understanding of alternative sexual practices.

Today, femdom continues to thrive as a vibrant and diverse community, with online forums, social media groups, and real-life events providing spaces for individuals to connect, explore, and celebrate their interests in female dominance and submission. With its emphasis on empowerment, consent, and sexual exploration, femdom remains an integral part of the broader BDSM community, offering individuals opportunities for self-discovery, intimacy, and pleasure.

Exhibition Announcement: Artist Statement

two young women caress in bed
Caress: Photo: Tony Ward, Copyright 2023

Text by Tony Ward, Copyright 2023


Artist Statement

Thirty years ago in 1993. I embarked on a new body of work that explored our rights in America to freedom of expression. My subjects were from all walks of life, from various races, religious backgrounds  and sexual persuasions. This melting pot that stubbornly defines America  formed the palette of a series of black and white photographs that defined an era.  What was that era?  It was the time in which sexual freedom and multiculturalism was on the rise. 

Unfortunately, in these times there are certain bigoted elements of our society that continue to attempt to roll back the hands of time. Sadly, Facisim in America is on the rise. Obsessions as a body of work reminds us of what we once were and still are, a free and open society in which each individual American is free to choose and be who they are.

To find out more about the exhibition, link here: